Having “the conversation” with Lucy


I never thought I’d be writing about this on the blog.
When I started this thing eight years ago, Lucy was only two years-old.
And this year she started 5th grade!  Next year she’ll be in middle school!  I mean, she’s basically almost married and having kids of her own.
It’s almost like the old saying, the days are long; the years are short, isn’t even true any more.
Everything is just short; and passing quickly.

(Kindergarten •  Fifth Grade)

The conversations have changed from Why do we have STOP signs? to
Why did we have World War II?
Who should be President?
Why can’t we teleport?
Which cereal has the most folic acid?

I love it all.
Well most of it all.  It’s really fun to have more meaningful conversations and to see their minds expanding.
But as you remember from 4th and 5th grade, we’ve also entered the uncomfortable conversation stage…or rather, the need for conversations about our changing bodies, puberty, periods, all that good stuff.
I know.
It feels funny to write about this here on my blog.
And I had been dreading, dreading “the conversation” with Lucy.
Maybe you’ve been in the same boat?
HelloFlo, First Period Kits asked me to share our experience with you.

Because last year Lucy and I finally sat down and had a conversation.


And guess what?  It was no big deal.
Maybe because we didn’t make it a big deal?  I don’t know.  I’m definitely not an expert.
Before we talked I got opinions from a lot of friends—asking them how they talked to their children about puberty and sex and all that jazz.  I don’t think you can gather too much information on this topic.

And then we just had a casual, to-the-point conversation.
I didn’t want to make the discussion too big, or extravagant, like we were having a special night out to discuss something serious.  Because I want these topics to feel like something she can always talk to me about, no matter what is on her mind.  Time will only tell with that.
But I approached it somewhat scientific, talking about our bodies and why they change.  We spent a lot of time talking about hygiene and deodorant, bras, etc. before jumping into Periods and some basics about sex.
And that’s something I really love about the HelloFlo First Period Kit (available exclusively at Target).  Not only is it full of essentials for a changing body, but the first thing you see when you open the box are two little guide booklets—one “for girls” and a one “for parents”.

It immediately puts you at ease.   The cards have simple illustrations and give practical advice for having these very conversations, about puberty.  I really loved the tip about “avoiding eye contact” as you talk. Haah.
I had another friend mention that one as well. Of course it’s fine to have eye contact with your child.   But she said that some of her best conversations are while she and her daughter drive in the car because neither of them feel pressured or uncomfortable to look at each other while they share.


Also in the kit are a box of U by Kotex pads, which has crazy fast absorption to help stop leaks (and the pads come individually wrapped in cute little packages–I’m a sucker for cute packaging)  Then there’s some lotion and lip balm, a cute bracelet made by women in Costa Rica, some hairbands, tissues, and best of all….a little HelloFlo bag to hold the pads.  You’ll also find other kits, with other products on their site.


I had to laugh at the cute little bag…because I remembered this post back when Lucy was in Kindergarten.

She had had a few little accidents at school.   So I made her a bag to hold an extra pair of undies and shorts so she could more discreetly go the bathroom and change.


When Lucy and I first started talking about periods, I thought it would be fun to make a similar bag to hold hygiene products.  But then the HelloFlo kit came one with one!
And it’s pretty cute.


Definitely much smaller, and smarter than the huge “discrete” bag I made in kindergarten.


During our first conversation about puberty, I showed Lucy what a pad looks like, and what a tampon looks like.  But opening this kit was great because it brought up the topic again.  And once her school had given their own health/hygiene talk last year in 4th grade, she and I discussed it again.  I think that’s kind of the key– to bring it up every now and then.  So it’s not this big one-time discussion.  I asked her if the school covered the same things we had talked about.  She said yes.  And she said the students could ask questions.

So what was your question?
Well, I asked if you had to set your alarm to wake up in the middle of the night so you could change your pad?
Haha.  I love that Lucy.  I’m so glad she’s open to talking about this.
And I asked her permission to share these stories with you, and to take pics of her with the HelloFlo kit, and she said that would be fine.


These are definitely evolving topics over here.  But I’m glad we’ve broken the ice. 
If you’re ready to take the plunge I say go for it.  Gather advice, pick up a HelloFlo kit, and just start talking and being open about it.


  1. 1) HokieKate

    Excellent post and thanks for sharing a new resource.

  2. 2) Lauren

    Lucy you are awesome!!! Thank you for talking about this. My daughter just started kindergarten and I’m already wondering about how to bring up new subjects like this as she ages. Thank you for sharing your experiences! So good to remember to keep it a continuing conversation.

  3. 3) Jen

    Another great book is “The Care and Keeping of You” by American Girl. It’s gives great information about a girl’s changing body. I had my 9 yr old read it after we had “The Talk” this summer.

    • 4) Denice

      I love that book! I have 4 daughters and gave each girl her own book when she was 9. It helped so much for each girl to have her own “instruction” guide. We had many conversations that we a bit easier because we had some help. I highly recommend that book!

    • 5) Charissa

      My mom took me through this book when I hit puberty. I’m 19 now, and I can say that this was incredibly helpful for her as well as for me! I used it as a guide for many years.

    • 6) Paula

      Yes that is a great book.

  4. 7) Rosa

    Thank you so much! My girls have a few more years before I have to give them “the talk,” but I’m not as anxious about it. And now, I can reference your blog post.

    Now, off to figure out what to sew for their costumes! 🙂

  5. 8) RaeLyn

    When my older girls hit that age, I used the American Girl “Care and Keeping of You” book. (It looks like they have 2 books now!). It allowed us to have all the information in one spot and we could talk about it as we read it together. It also provided a reference for when my girls just wanted to “check the information.” It is a really fantastic resource. I am excited to see the Hello Flo bag too…I’ll keep it in the back of my mind for when my younger girls are ready. Thanks!

  6. 9) Lisa

    *Please* tell me you’ve seen the First Moon Party video?! It is so funny! I had to look it up after reading this post because it was one of those commercials that was so good you forget what the product actually was. Sure enough, it was HelloFlo! My older daughter is the same age as Lucy, so we’ve been having the same conversation here. My daughter *loved* the video, and also the A.G. books…looks like we will be adding this kit to the mix!

  7. 10) Jamie

    Do they make Goodbye Flo for menopausal women? I think I need something like that. 🙂 Thanks for the resource!

    • 11) Maaike

      This menopausal woman just snorted tea out her nose cause I laughed so hard at your comment! I definitely think there is a market niche out there!! Maybe a discrete bag for my fan?

  8. 12) Kerrie

    I have one that says she doesn’t want to talk about it….as hard as I try (without pushing). This kit might be good for her to keep in her locker!! Hoping we are several more months off of the start of flo!!

  9. 13) Aairyn

    Lucy, you are freakin cool. Teaching others to be open minded and brave by sharing your own story. Go Willards!

  10. 14) cecile

    Well, I was thinking “oh, no, not yet anotehr commercial post”, but… this one was woth it. Thank you for sharing ! My daughter is Lucy’s age exactly, and we have been having this conversation, too. I think I will stop by Target very soon to get her one of those. Thanks !

  11. 15) Bdaiss

    I’ve used the “if they’re old enough to ask they’re old enough to hear the answer” approach. That means for my 1st and 4th grader they already have a whole heck of a lot of knowledge and there hasn’t been “A Talk” but lots of little (age appropriate) ones. I did just pick up a few books (The care and keeping of you, My body My Self) for back up support and so they can do their own research. Love the Hello Flo kit! I’ll keep that one in my back pocket until my girlie is a few years older. I’ve always loved the idea some cultural a use of celebrating the first period. Let’s take the stigma out of the whole thing!

  12. 16) Chatti

    Thanks for the info and resources. I guess I’m a little behind on having this talk with my 10 year old. I was unable to find these kits on the Target website. Is this an in-store only item?

    • 17) cgw

      I used the American Girl “Care and Keeping of You” book, we call it the “changing bodies” book. This was a couple of years ago, and I didn’t know these care kits even existed, i just made one for my daughter instead. You can too!


    My 10 years old daughter is kind of the same. She offten talks about global warming, wars in the Near East and the different thoughtway of the people. The older one (she is 12) can not imagine how can we be alone in this big universe, etc. So the kids are smarter than most of the people think. They have so many questions and if they ask we have to answer.

  14. 19) Diana G

    I found out with my own daughters and granddaughters that if the parents are honest enough (no the stork doesn’t deliver a baby), then not make a big thing of it- have the talk of why? am I cursed with it and boys aren’t.
    (that is what my oldest used to call it). Things go alot smoother and easier for moms, grandmas too when the kids don’t want their moms to have the talk with them.
    Way to go with the kit !! Wish they would of had that around a few years back (well quite a few years!)

  15. 20) Eleanor

    Its great to see this addressed so matter of factly. I am a mom of daughters, and a Girl Scout leader, and I think we can’t do too much to ensure that our girls see their bodies as remarkable and functional, instead of limiting. I put on a day camp this summer for girls who are going into middle school, and one of the big things we covered was this topic. Luckily, these girls now know that tampons don’t go in your butt. 🙂 I also partner with a company who sells “First Moon Kits” (I sew the pouches and compresses). Here is the link: http://theirisco.com/ceremonial-kits/, if anyone is interested in a different approach.

    • 21) Mindy

      I’m happy to see a Girl Scout Leader here! “My Girls” are in their 30″s now. When they were in fourth grade I asked the parents privately if they would allow me to talk to their daughter in a regular Girl Scout meeting. They All said’ “Oh, by all means YES!” I’m a Nurse and as their leader, I was comfortable talking about the anatomy and hormones. They knew I worked with women in my job and were very open asking questions in an open discussion. It was the beginning of many dialogs between myself and the girls (some times in private). I was blessed with that group of Girls for many years. We still get together when ever we are in the same state. Bless you Dana for bringing to light the time honored “Talk”. It is important!

  16. 22) Alyssa Welsch

    Nice post! My oldest daughter is the same age as Lucy and I for sure now need to head to Target!

  17. 23) Leslie

    This summer I bought my daughter “It’s great to be a Girl” by Dannah Gresh. It is a wonderful Christian book and I loved how age appropriate and Bible based the content was. It gave my daughter enough information without getting into the details of sex that she doesn’t need to know at her age. The book celebrated her body as a masterpiece of God. I highly recommend.

  18. 24) Claudia

    First I won’t spend a dime at target. They endanger children with their anything goes bathroom policy.

    Second it’s ridiculous that it’s that hard for parents to discuss sex with their kids. It’s an amazing gift that we should treat as such.

    Perhaps I’ll blog some day on how I did it. Without the help of those just trying to make a buck.

    • 25) Dana

      I’m glad it comes easy for you to talk to your kids on this topic. That’s really awesome. I guess everyone has different comfort levels.
      I’d love to read a blog post about your ideas/tips. The more info on it, the better equipped we all are to talk about something that yes, is really cool and special.

  19. 26) hotdish

    I’m late to the conversation but just wanted to add a thought: I think it’s great that more parents are comfortable talking to their kids about puberty and sex, but please, please, please remember to teach both your daughters AND your sons. I believe that in order to take the stigma and negativity out of sexuality, out of being female/male, out of the differences in male vs. females is to teach both sexes equally about the other. Differences should be taught and celebrated, maybe then girls won’t have to fear their growing bodies, boys won’t have to be embarrassed by changing voices, and there can be an appreciation for each other.

  20. 27) Nikhat

    Way to go Dana ,,,, I’m already a fan of u but this post makes me even bigger fan of urs ???????????????????????? I have a daughter almost same as Lucy and have been dreading to take this topic though we’ve been through just the basic good and bad touch I feel encouraged by ur post and move further . Since I practically had no talk whatsoever with anyone I felt lost on the topic . Thank u for sharing such a private thing with us and of course kudos for Lucy ???????? bye.

  21. 28) TracyKM

    I can find the kit on the Hello Flo site, but not on Target.com.. Is it in store only? I’m in Canada but my husband will be visiting his sister in New Mexico this weekend so I thought maybe she could pick it up to bring back. But is it big? He’s got only a carry on suitcase that is stuffed LOL

  22. 29) Carmen

    i just stared

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